APPLE SEASON

Hello Friends,



I have been listening to a lot of Misora Hibari and her covers lately. Not for anything, just because a sentimental connection to the past is the one thing driving me forward these days. The present, may I put none too politely, fucking blows. Hibari's songs did much the same for her country then as they do for me now. Born the same year as my dad (1937), understandably there's nothing political, challenging or angry in anything she offers. There is gentle, loving, witty, bawdy and even dreamlike testimonies to more idyllic times. She sings and once again the world is beautiful and worth one more look. After all, I'm the working man. I am tired of hearing my country put down and shamed. There's hard times ahead and the economy is a lot more than embarassing. I just wanna turn on my radio and laugh about that meddling rickshawman.

What I want from a cover is the familiar but not the expected. UA works classic songs like classic fabrics. She cuts here, embellishes there, twists and turns all the while maintaining the integrity of the original in a way that is neither boring or predictable.

Try finding Misora's original RINGO OIWAKE りんご追分 and then I highly recommend digging up UA's version. In English, it's called "Apple and the Fork in the Road". The song was Misora's first hit at the age of fifteen. It's operatic highs and lows, typical of classical enka, sound as though she is lulling a snake to sleep. This clip of her singing it in a film I don't know the name of absolutely silences me. Misora's sounds like it came out of an old Western (hoofbeats and all). UA takes it to the beach.

Speaking of apples and nostalgia, this video of Shiina Ringo's cleverly titled "Ringo no Uta" (Apple Song) makes me smile as it literally recounts the chronological turns of her aesthetic. Ah, for those carefree pseudo-fetish days of pouty rock.

Another song I'm listening to a lot is Oborozukiyo-Inori 朧月夜~祈り (Prayer for Moonlight). This erhu-laced romantic pop version sung by the likeable Miss Mika Nakashima is pleasing to me in that this is so not a pop song. It was written in the 20's as a traditional piece to help students learn the koto and shamisen. Aiko Shimada's version sticks to more traditional threads and is intended to be a lullaby.

ただいま JAPANEE SOUL

Parting is never easy in any language and I found myself doing so in English, bad English, modest Japanese, barely-dignified bastardizations of both, noogies, hugs, groans, beers and smiles. Japan is a hard knot to untangle once you've clawed your way into the weave. The things I missed in NY don't shine as bright as they used. Many things need redefining. I'm a bit uncomfortable.

Japan made me a fan of enka. Partly because I gravitate towards what has gone before but also because there is no faster way to bond with the fellows you work with than to respect the pop of their generation. My principals and vice-principals, the PTA members, even a few of the teachers would be amazed enough to learn that I even knew names like Misora Hibari, Yosui Inoue and Ishikawa Sayuri. It is a different matter altogether to pick up the mic and let go like it's 1955. With them I was always in the right crowd. Going to karaoke with ALTs and singing "Dani California" for the billionth time is truly a boorish obligation. They could have at least sucked my kiss.

I've culled my own bevy of standards, the most complicated of which was the original version of 車屋さん KURUMAYA SAN. Once covered by my beloved pomme, it is truly amazing to hear the late Misora singing a classic example of what Shiina Ringo has made into philosophy. Old with new. Swanky foreign jazz blended with traditional undulations. The lyrics are biting, coquettish and conversational, written to evoke images of rural Japan, as idealistic as Dixie. Idyllic characters like the festival booth owner, the drunk old farmer and the meddling rickshawman (kurumaya san) assigned to deliver a love note in absolute secrecy.

naisho de watashite naisho de henji ga
naisho de kuru you ni
dekya senkai na

(in secrecy deliver it, in secrecy turn over the reply only to me)

It's a complicated old ditty and the apple loves nothing more than complication. The Rickshawman is something of a simpleton and upon failing to do as instructed, he is scolded by the singer with the words:

"He who opens something not addressed to him is foolish but the one who addressed it is even moreso."

One listen and you will understand why my colleagues laughed their asses off whenever I attempted to sing it. That part is a bitch to sing.

My last hurrah was on the eve of my wakarekai (farewell party). All my other schools just happened to be gathered at the same bar. The vice principal of Futada Elementary, knowing my penchant for humiliation, thrust a mic in my hand and announced that he would select an appropriate song for me. I was appropriately drunk so I said hi.

The song was AMAGIGOE 天城越え by Ishikawa Sayuri。If a standard for karaoke exists, folks, this is it. This is their "Somewhere Over the Rainbow.", "Miss American Pie", "Nessun Dorma" rolled into one. If you claim to be Japanese and not know this yarn, the Emperor himself gives you detention. They've even made a reggaeton version. It is not an easy song to sing or understand. The lyrics displayed at the bottom of the screen are so archaic they are no longer recognized by even adult Japanese. It's so poetic that even a sentiment as bitter as jealousy becomes somehow sweet.

"If another seeks to intrude, may I then destroy you?"

Ah, Japan.

Catering to the national passion for competition, karaoke bars have installed some weird electronic ranking system for how well one follows lyrics and when you're trashed those numbers really fucking count! I sang knowing that good or bad, I'd receive the same appreciation. Kyoto sensei was so proud to have chosen wisely and dammit but I do love that song! I scored a 92, higher than anyone else.

Stay tuned, I'm far from done with this madness.

I'll Take the Green, please.

Reiko remembers 尾崎豊 Yutaka Ozaki:

"God, the things I wanted to do to him when I was 12!" She bites her glossed lip and smiles.

"I bet."

"He was terribly good looking," she moans. "I mean he was beautiful enough to convince you that he wasn't even real, you know those impossibly good-looking people. On the poster he was an idol but when he sang, he turned into an idol with a beating heart. Do you get what I mean?"

Sure.

"Not really. Go on."

She is more than glad to. Yutaka Ozaki devastated Japan at the same time the New Kids were the right stuff and Johnny Kitagawa hit his stride. Kitagawa spearheaded the boy band scene in Japan. Asia's answer to Menudo, he's been marketing and packaging musical eye candy since the 60's. Nearly everything he touches turns into (a lawsuit) gold. Man loves his job. He finds clean young Ganymedes and trains them, as only the Japanese can, to be beautiful, flawless and forever under 21. Then he makes a killing. Johnny's Entertainment Media and its proteges are still in rotation, of course. There's a lot of want out there.

Yutaka Ozaki was a bounty. Impeccable looks, great voice, marketable teeth (rare!) But he was no Johnny Boy. For one thing, he didn't dance. For another he wrote his own songs.

If Joey Mycintyre had suddenly stopped "Please Don't Go Girl"-ing to sing about his depression. If Justin stopped bringing sexy back and started regretting getting that girl pregnant. If Britney started singing about moral degradation and lack of freedom, we might get a taste of what Ozaki was about. Nothing is sexier than a rebel, non?

Particularly in Japan. Particularly in the 80's.

That's ヤバい yabai; multi-faceted word meaning essentially "dangerous", "badass", "not good in a good way". Someone willing to do the unthinkable. Pierce their tongue. Speak out. Get notice beyond expectation.

"It drove me crazy!" Reiko laments. "He wrote songs about love, of course, but more about its consequence. How it made you doubt and examine your nature. He sang about loneliness as though he'd never had a friend. He wrote about anger and how good it was. He wrote about what it feels like to have no voice at all. He would get enraged when he sang, genuinely pissed off. I felt really close to him then. No one else ever sang about stuff like that! It was like he was speaking for us rather than to us sometimes. "

In 1992 Ozaki was found dead, half naked in a Tokyo alleyway at age 27.

In 2004, two tribute albums were released. BLUE & GREEN. BLUE consisted of contributions from major label breakers--Mr. Children, Utada Hikaru, Cocco, among others. I listened to this album once and liked it. The top sellers sang Ozaki's songs poised and melodic. A cleanly arranged thank you. Not bad.

The GREEN album was better.

The guys in green, ya know they doin' alright. The Indies and Unknowns. Chords allowed to go raw, to rage, swerve off kilter a bit. Take the contribution from 熊谷 和徳 Kumagai Kazunori, 米軍キャンプUS Armed Force Camp. It opens with a delirious plastic tub drum staccato trying frantically to escape. Or feet. It's what will play when credits roll. Kumagai speaks the lyrics like a requiem.

"Alone on the street with nowhere to go. Industry washed up and friends all gone out one by one like the ash on my cigarette. My soul made a tiny noise the night the heart within you died for the first time. You were so refined in the ways you never smiled. In a crowd of people, never saying a single thing. Tonight let's come together and lick our wounds. We'll fuck them all, mock the world and find love as a blanket to curl up in."

Reiko sighs.

"Maybe I'm just getting older but when I see Kamenashi Kazuya's eyes fill with tears and beg me not to leave in a video, I don't want to hold him because I know when the song is over, he'll be alright."

The Gifted Ones

This is 森田童子 Morita Douji, acid folk vixen of the 70's. Here she is singing her hit　奥たちの失敗/Our Failures. This tender-voiced ray of sunshine makes me reflect fondly on Cobain. She does not, however, instill in me the desire to off myself in a million slow-motion glam shots.

Morita's got a song that bands I enjoy like to cover. It's called たとえば僕が死んだら/Tatoeba Boku ga Shindara or For Example, What if I Died...?

She sings of her deaths so very gently, it's hard not to shed a single glittering tear that will fall forgotten in the dust on the plain of this lost earth in which we silently drown with our moms. I don't normally care for this abundance of blatant despair in my music but I can usually be bought in other tongues. Tragedy is such a relative thing. I can cry listening to Cocco but Morita's words do not move me in the same way.

These, however, do kick considerable ass.

This is Number Girl covering Morita Douji at a live event. My favored listen.

This is Eastern Youth covering Morta Douji.

While I'm here, I'd like to push a little more Number Girl on you. Check out this badass cover of Teppu Surudoku Natte/Sharpening the Iron I found on YouTube.

It's astounding to me how cool this song sounds stripped down to just percussion. If I closed my eyes, I'd think someone was pounding out nails on an anvil. Or summoning spirits on the taiko. Or both.

Jesus, but I do love my numbered girl.

Beaches

Cocco was barely more than a girl when she began writing what would turn into a pop sensation. Sometimes whispering and sometimes shouting her macabre juvenile fantasies, her arrangers did their best to find layouts for her lyrical delirium that would still please a crowd. Now Cocco is an adult and she has not made much noise for quite some time until now.

Her most recent album, Kira Kira, seems to reflect a desire to revisit her roots. Cocco is an island child. Okinawa is a decidedly mystical place full of fearsome stone dogs, flowers that resemble paint splotches on stems and fiery food. People usually go there seeking escape. Where do its residents go? Into their own heads it seems. In the white hot sunshine, Cocco sifted sand flecked with coral between her toes and thought. Not of blood. Not of thorns. Not of tenderly rending lovers into soft pulpy ribbons.

She got nostalgic.

This is the Chochoi Lullaby. (チョッチョイ子守唄). According to Cocco, it was written from forgotten fragments of a tune her mother used to sing. The lyrics were not Japanese but uchina or native Okinawan. The song is about a little boy getting ready to sleep. He asks a sparrow (in this case, a bird like a sandpiper) to wake him in the morning with its cry. Cocco admitted only two sounds remained in her ears and these were "Cho-choi" or "chirp chirp". She spun her own thread from there. Cocco has never revealed the roots of her lore quite in this way before. She has many lullabies. But these did not come from home, they came from her.

The story goes like this.

Sandman wearing Radiohead's sneakers picks up his guitar and begins plucking it like a sanshin. When the vibrations reach the black sea, its waves soften and hush. Calmed by heat and perfume, o-hime sings.

A Little World

Boiled egg yolks everywhere remind you to appreciate the moon in Autumn. Soon you won't be able to see it. Winter nights are bitter and cloudy and no one bothers looking up. The man doesn't live there, don't you know? Just two forest rabbits pounding mochi (sticky rice cake) with a wooden mallet. Mackerel and suri are at their fattest now. Persimmons gleam against olive-colored branches like drops of coral blood. Flavors get richer, colors deepen and people get sad.

My thoughts were always miles away from despair. I was raised on Halloween, dammit. I was also fortunate enough to live a stone's throw away from New England and the constant smell of woodsmoke, cider doughnuts, orange pumpkins, harvest hay rides. The turning of the season is a somewhat more melancholy affair but by no means less pleasurable.

This cover of the jazz standard 'Autumn Leaves' (translated here as 'kareha' 枯葉 or 'Dead Leaves') is sung in convincing French by ma cher pomme (yes, Shiina Ringo). A time of dying may be just cause for sorrow but that doesn't mean we can't make out. Or sigh and clutch yellowing photographs. Ringo's voice is not rich or smoky even when she's putting on a foreign accent. I don't believe my apple was out to redefine the song but she did. The digital background is cold and plastic. It doesn't make me sad at all.

Like sakura in Spring, the emergence of the scarlet star-shaped leaves called momiji are eagerly anticipated. Naturally, the Japanese have a song for them. Aiko Shimada sings with a voice as shimmery as the koto accompanying her.

There is something both eerie and sorrowful about Japanese traditional songs. It is perfectly genius the way they brush upon both but never quite lean one way or the other. The Japanese are fond of the gray spaces, the in-between colors of emotion and sound. Aiko's cover of this Edo lullaby doesn't so much lull as it makes me think in cliches. One pluck (courtesy of Elizabeth Falconer) and, ridiculously, all I see are samurai. Oh yes it even pulls that rippling Asian gimmick. Wait for it, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.

But let's disassociate from the sound. I'll tell you the words. The singer might be mother or some other person not expected to care for an infant of the time. It's dark as were the ages. There's smoke or at least its scent, burning useless embers. It's still drafty in these houses of paper and wood and the baby frets.

She tells the child he is good and coaxes him to sleep. She wonders where his nurse or komori (子-ko, child 守りmori, protect) has gone. Perhaps to her home village in the mountains, yes that is where she has gone. What do you suppose she'll bring back for you? A soft flute sighs in the breeze.

I recall discovering Aiko Shimada around the same time I discovered Hem. As a solo artist, she has a voice that makes itself comfortable in many sofas. At times she is shades of Bjork at a less explosive pace, atmospheric with no end in sight. Just a gauzy stream of consciousness that takes you wherever you want it to--the next dimension, the shadowed realm of Morpheus, across the street.

As providence would have it, she has an Autumn Song. She could do with just the guitar but she dresses it up modestly with a faint zither and a crisp breeze. Like the lullaby of old, she sings an elegant ode to an end.

Livin in the Past

Hello m'friends,

Here I be with another smattering of Japan guaranteed.

I love The Wiz. Me and my sis have burgeoning childhood associations with that film and the sounds that came out of it. Crappy production or no, it embodied the Big Apple on the brink of the 80's when it was an older kind of badass.

Picture the scene when they first get to the Emerald City. How staggering, how bright, how brilliant Manhattan at night. Everyone is dressed to the nine and shining like a galaxy. Minako Yoshida (美奈子吉田) belongs in that TOWN with both lips from the very first trademark riff. Does anyone use that swanky thing anymore? It screams the era out loud. Yoshida's hair alone has more soul than a very soulful thing. Later she became known for singing gospel but in this town she's covered in spangles, too much green shadow and rockin the disco like the rent depends on it.

That Umbrella song...

For my next offering, I give you the one man boy band Inoue Yosui (井上陽水). This man's been covered more times than a very covered thing. A powerhouse in his time, he was responsible for the first million-selling album in Japan. Oh, do they like him here. His song writing prowess did great things for Puffy who established a name overseas (Puffy AmiYumi). He has a profound knack for what the people wanna hear.

It was no shock to me that my first exposure to him was through a cover. I had been devouring anything by UA of late and found a most mournful blues melody titled 傘が無い or Kasa Ga Nai. (Ain't Got no Umbrella). You don't have to understand the lyrics to know you're being trodden by cold rain and contemplating doom.

UA has a graceful way of bringing you down. She sings sad songs like the French make wine, expertly. Her pain is slow, aching and sweet. Inoue's was meant for a smoky snack bar full of lost souls and old peanuts. UA's deep voice took Inoue's rainy day and gave it thunder.

Here is UA's version.

Here is Inoue's original.


Side note: Woah! When did the Eagles start releasing albums in Japanese? Nah, that's just Fukinotou (ふきのとう) with another vintage folk act from the vaults 白い冬 or "White Winter". I hear this song and immediately think of mountains not deserts.

I have oft heard my students sing a children's song designed, as children's songs are wont to do, to be ingrained.

Ken Hirai (平井堅) is gorgeous and when I close my eyes, I think I'm listening to one of those Boyz turned Men. His cover of this sad nursery standard sends me unusual vibes. It's called.
大きな古時計or Ookina Furudokei. ("Grandfather's Clock"). It's easy to sing and fun as long as you don't think of the lyrics. It recalls a boy's fond memory of the clock, from the day his grandfather was born to the day he died and it stopped running.

Children love to make the "tick tock" sound. I gotta say it takes some of the melancholy out.

Way too many downers on the field. Let's break it up, yes?

It takes a presence profound for me to enjoy Japanese males singing. Madness is one. A hectic tempo another. I recently witnessed one of my Japanese friends sing this Royal Pain in the Ass by The Unicorns (ユニコーン) who were a pretty heavy item in their day. Oh but do they split my sides! Poor Kazu was quite spent when it was over. The song is aptly titled 大迷惑 Oomeiwaku (Royal Pain in the Ass). If a Looney Tune were to manifest itself in music, it would sound something like this.

Oh man, I can't believe I haven't pushed this on you earlier. This track has worn itself out on my Ipod. If it were a CD, it'd be long past the skipping point. It's called 赤い靴は踊る or Akai Kutsu wa Odoru (Red Dancing Shoes) and it is by Sugar Mama who have been compared to another Japanese jazz fusion band, Ego Wrappin'. I can hear Aterciopelados or some other husky-voiced Colombian singing this with nary a qualm. It's quirky, sexy and like most fusion bands, not going to take you anywhere you expect. Their music is mainly a mix of jazz with some Latin and a little bit of soft rock. I like to fantasize tangos and picture myself singing this song with flowers in my hair and lips in a hue no less than 4 shades too dark.

Okay, that's enough. Tune in next month when I rant psychotic about the
Ulfuls (ウルフルズ, ) and how much I cannot say their name.

Summer Jam

So I wet myself.

I didn't actually but the rush of adrenaline and my period always makes my bladder whine like a toddler in a toy store. I was lucky. I had the previous night crawled in at some unsavory hour from a nicotine-stained karaoke dive in an attempt to sleep off my birthday hangover when I was awakened by a seismic hiccup.

Okay, more like a damp belch.

"Am I dreaming?" I thought as I watched my wooden bureau sway dangerously to and fro.

"Oh. An earthquake." I realized sluggishly and rolled over. Normal earthquakes do that. Five seconds later the bed frame rattled with me on it, jostling me violently. My house felt like it had been picked up and handled by a giant baby. When I heard the explosion of glass breaking, I decided a normal earthquake did not do that and that I had best take cover.

I had to pee like the dickens!

Fortunately, it was brief but that was enough. It was bad outside, folks. My house, having been constructed from plastic and rubber bands in the early 90's, was spared the front page news. Older dwellings from the 40's and 50's-- wooden cracked things in need of repair--had been reduced to splinters. Sifting through the mess that was my kitchen, I was sent back to the floor by an aftershock.

Stupid crust.

I was in need of some uplifting as I sorted through the shards of my fallen dishes but I gave up. It's too sad to put it plainly. I just turn down the volume and slow the tempo. HUMBERT HUMBERT's cover of the famed Japanese children's song, Aka Tonbo/赤トンボ/Red Dragonfly. It's drowsy and tucking you in even though the bloated sun isn't quite dead yet. Acoustic folk with a glassy-eyed supernatural intro. I don't know what instrument is responsible for those sounds but I'd be unsettled or sad if I weren't so mesmerized.

I will unconditionally adore Kenichi Asai no matter how passionately he sings through his nose. Though I am not sure I can tell exactly where his original band, Blankey Jet City, ends and his latest incarnation, JUDE, begins I know he'll always lead me by the hand into dark acid trips I'm nervous about getting into. His guitar sings like a siren, you see, I really have no choice. Kaisuiyoku/海水浴/Seawater Bathing is a dark, cinematic song in the predatory echoey vein of Violet Fizz.

Certain altos have magic. Lazy and too hip to be here Rufus Wainwright. Slurred on opiate and half dreaming Hope Sandoval. Then there's UA. It's a bit goofy to hear this ska through molasses track known as Private Surfer/プライベート サーファー but UA's deep jazzy voice fits it like a glove, compelling you with the slap of a Texas salmon to calm or sway in the breeze. Or slow dance if you need to be a sap.

Man, I wish I had a porch. If I had a porch, I'd exist barefoot on it. I'd make lemonade from simple syrup and mint and get someone nice to play the harmonica for me all day. I'd find a watering hole, wear a straw hat and fish for trout in Abercromie and Fitch while Keison set the mood. The Americana dopamine of the blues is as worldly addictive and undying as the myth of the cowboy. No matter what language you speak, someone somewhere will always want to groove to that beat. Endless Summer/Owaranai Natsu/終わらない夏.

Ok, I feel a little better now.

VINTAGE

Hey yo hey,

It's Summer again and I'm fucked, yesiree. Screwed. Fouled. Besmirched.
Summer by the Japan Sea is unusual and tricksy, it is. A fair wind may blow and the sun may shy away like some tarty wallflower but stand around idling and you'll end up broiled like a capon on a spit.

A well meaning arsehole once informed me that the Japanese artists I have for years idolized would be "nowhere if Janis hadn't choked on her coke".

Whatever, daddy. Janis Ian is alive and well.

I've heard flack a-plenty for what I listen to, even from the Japanese. I can't be annoyed or anything. It's just taste.

Though it may be argued that artists worldwide may never have plucked their first life-changing chords or written their first smack-induced tribute to sex/love/peace without the example of Morrison, Hendrix and Joplin, the Japanese music industry was thriving long before Janis even scored her first roach clip.

Akiko Wada's classic, あの鐘を鳴らすのはあなた (The One Who'll Ring the Bell is You) has got some soul. Complete with bubble afro, bell bottoms and polyester. She belts it hard like Aretha and croons low like Turner. She sounds more like she's singing from the steps of a brownstone in the Bronx than Western Japan. Nicknamed "The Empress" for her impressive stature, she has been covered, adored and ridiculed with the best. She's ethnically Korean, by the way. Not Japanese. Bravo, my dear. Bravo.

The Peanuts are a campy twin sister duo from Nagoya who communicate telepathically with Mothra. Koi no Balance or "Love Balance" is the track that got away from KILL BILL. It's so 60's you can fairly smell the Kitty Galore. I like to strut down the street to this and eye walls where I can hide from the man in the gabardine suit (he's a spy).

The 1969 award-winning いいじゃないの幸せならば (If Only We Were Happy) by Sagara Naomi 佐良直美 is a slow mournful melody that belongs in a small shady tobacco-stained cafe in Havana surrounded by toucans and unshaven revolutionaries. May this song soften their souls and make their mojitos go down colder.

I know I've mentioned Koi no Kisetsu Season of Love by Pinky and the Killers here before but because it fits, I'm going to do it again. Listen to this song! It's groovy, baby. Another hit from 1969, this one sends the grannies into a frenzy. It makes everyone wanna do the hand jive or a quirky little hip wiggle in a tiny skirt/white patent leater go go boots combo whenever it plays.

Go to Misora Hibari's sexy sexy official website. Proof she was the Ella Fitzgerald, Judy Garland AND Shirley Temple of her hemisphere. Dig that intro, oooh!

http://www.misorahibari.com/intro.html

Here is a YouTube clip of her as a twelve year old scamp performing one of my favorite songs "Tokyo Kid". How loveable. Come on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YaqnfrKwV7I

Another classic song by Misora called "Omatsuri Mambo". Summer in Japan means "festivals" or "matsuri". In this rump-shakin number you'll hear the traditional boisterious cry of "WASHHOI!" The meaning is somewhat unclear but it's used by the men who carry the shrine on their backs to promote teamwork and happiness.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZQe7qtn-JY

Going to end on a song that calls for a scene.

Japanese traditional inns (ryokan) are hella creepy. Everything from the creaky floors to the inevitable ancient proprietress taking your credit info wants to give you the impression that you are a guest of a family. You will not see a front desk or a bellhop lingering around for a tip. You are entering an intimate environment, one that has been very lived in.

Most ryokan boast a collection of treasured family heirlooms in their rooms, some so decrepit that they might have made out with a Shogun or two. The Japanese have a great respect for the essences of old things and where there are old things, there is also mold.

Ok, all the ryokans I've stayed in were dirt cheap, scary and wonderful. Cracked walls, dusty tatami mats, the reek of years clinging to used and threadbare futons. A veritable playground for allergens and ghosts, both of whom could choke me. The last one I stayed in had a faintly smiling Japanese doll behind a dusty cracked glass case. A little girl wearing a faded kimono with bleeding hems. Her black eyes were painted wide open and her tiny scar of a mouth was so worn you could barely see it.

She and not Yukie Saori should have sung Yoake no Scat. One of those addictive haunting melodies that makes me want to keep the lights on. The song is meant for lovers and where they go when they first meet. "A world without time." It's got that echoey doom of The End Of The World by Skeeter Davis and all the allure of Sound of Silence by you know who. Wouldn't it have been something if ol' Art covered this one? I never liked The Yellow Monkey until they did.

And yeah, O-Ran should have kicked it to this one.

If you'd like to hear these tracks, I've uploaded them to a zip file. Because I do not know how things work, I can only hope I did it right.

Enjoy!

Obsessed Again

Hey yo hey,

Back from Golden Week.

My skin is smooth as polished glass and smells faintly sulphuric from the many mountain hot springs that served as my mode of cleansing for the week I spent traipsing the humid southern island of Kyushu. Some envision beaches when they plot their precious escapes. I tackle steamy off-the-road onsen cheek to cheek with befuddled farmers. The conversation was lively. There is only honesty between naked people.

I return with charming photos, a musical rambling or two and happily tetanus-free.

Are you by chance feeling gloomy?

Might I reccomend some Blue Hearts?

Linda Linda was the feel good song of the 80's. A certainly upbeat punk outfit if ever one existed, The Blue Hearts hail from the era of skinny neon ties and white leather fringe. Here they are legend. Currently, I wish they and not plastic jewelry would make a comeback. If you wants a crowd of Japanese thirty-somethings a-jumpin and a-meowin', you will know to bust out with Hiroto Komotou's classic ugly meat-grinder voice:

Dobu nezumi mitai ni (I look like a sewer rat)
Utsukushiku naritai (But I wanna be beautiful)
Shashin ni wa utsuranai (It won't turn up in photographs)
Utsukushisa ga aru kara. (Because beauty is there)

They even include a honky-friendly chorus:

Linda Lindaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Linda Linda Lindaaaa-aaaaa

Speaking of the 80's, may I ask with semi-assurance that a majority of the people I now address have viewed/heard of or has a friend/mum/cat who has viewed/heard of Kill Bill Vol. 1?

I adored that soundtrack.

The 5,6,7,8's didn't do much for me. They kinda sounded like a kid sister of Shonen Knife. I fell more for the sensual enka ballad of O-Ran's last stand ("Flower of Carnage" by Meiko Kaji) and that song that kept playing every time Uma Thurman got pissed off.

That was a remix of a classic song by Tomoyasu Hotei aka my new obsession du jour. (said classic song Battle Without Honor or Humanity)

Everything about him wants you to know he is man with whom not to fuck.

He's huge, for one thing. A tall, tall man. Who knows what was in his kyushoku growing up but his stature and skill are intimidating. His guitar wants to find you and make sure you don't rat on him. Or at least rock until the floors crack. He croons with every ounce of Bowie's steel and none of his frippery.

All the way to Osaka, we disturbed the relative peace of the Tohoku Expressway with his first album Guitarhythm Forever Vol. 1. 80's as you please, the second the taiko drums started on "Sayonara Andy Warhol", we knew we were in for many unwashed and unplanned adventures. "Radio!Radio!Radio!", "Siren" and "Serious?" all brought me back to a place I never saw in a time I'll never forget.

Still feeling crumpled? Let's see, I'm pretty sure I had some candy floating around the bottom of my bag.

Kojima Mayumi is a swanky hepcat of the early 90's whose sound resonates the early 60's. She was on her game before Miss Apple was even out of high school. She sings like a cat, a touchable tease and I can see without looking what she's wearing. For some reason boys flock to her like lemmings to the sea. All my guy friends have been unconditionally smitten with her. I found her one day rummaging through my college boyfriend's CD mixes. Right up there with Offspring, Skinny Puppy, and Korn, there was Kojima Mayumi.

Check out my personal favorites "Manatsu no Umi" (Midsummer Sea) or "Hatsukoi" (First Love). For a schizophrenic bossa nova ditty, go attack "Ano Ko wa Abunai yo" (That Boy is Dangerous). It goes from a sunny street cafe on the West Side to Carnival in Rio with pleasing swiftness.

Let's see, what else I got for ya?

When I first got into Ringo, I had been searching high and low for a Japanese band that didn't sound remotely like it came off an anime soundtrack. Right before I bit the apple, my hot and dusty bartender lent me his Elephant Kashimashi CD and I was very very pleased.

Mayonaka no Hero had me from the word "sousaaa." The opening riff didn't hurt either.

Ai no Yume o Kure (Gimme Dreams of Love) made me want to smoke, purr and wear leather which pleased my bartender to no end. I would make comparisons if I was any good at all with names but you know I'm not so I'll just say that they rock in an old time kind of way and you should definitely check them out. They're dated and not the easiest to find so ask a Japanese comrade, pillage your closest bit torrent, or e-mail me and I'll be glad to hook you up.

I will close by saying for reasons I can't explain, I am listening to Rip Slyme. I don't really go for the Japanese take on hip-hop but their groovy song Masterpiece amuses me. I find many Japanese dudes singing in English funny and I'll take a smile where I can get it. Tomorrow there will be work.


Songs to Seek:

The Blue Hearts/Linda Linda
Tomoyasu Hotei 布袋寅泰/ Sayonara Andy Warholさよならアンディ・ウォーホル/ /Serious?/ Radio!Radio!Radio!/Battle Without Honor or Humanity/Siren
Kojima Mayumi 小島麻由美/ Manatsu no Umi/Hatsukoi/ Ano ko wa Abunai yo
Elephant Kashimashi/ Ai no Yume o Kure/ Mayonaka no Hero
Rip Slyme/Masterpiece

It's The End of the World

Hi,

この世の限り-Kono Yo no Kagiri- (The World's Limit)

If I ever met my doom in a poetic Tarantino bloodbath, I'd wanna draw my last slow motion gasp to this song.

I am shamelessly in love so I am selfishly pushing it on you. It's by Shiina Ringo. It's bilingual. That's her older brother, Junpei, singing with her. If I ever recorded a song with my sibling, I'd want it to be just like this one singular sensation.

Or, eh, anything off the "Pete's Dragon" soundtrack (with the exception of that Candle on the Water drek)

I've been waiting for a Showa-Tei, footlight parade, Oh-So-Quietish number from Shiina since she let Tokya Ska Paradise cover "Sid and the Daydream". She almost met my needs with "Invisible Man" on Tokyo Jihen's ADULT but no, I didn't envision the chorus line, the mirrored stairs, the fireworks or Daddy Warbucks until this one.

This will stop your show. Suddenly, I don't care that it's allergy season and I can't breathe worth a damn.

The song is off her latest album "Heisei Fuuzoku". When I fall out of love with this track, I'll tell you about the rest.

Here's a romanization/translation of the Japanese. I'm not-so-covertly hoping Tavie will like it enough to learn it so we can sing together.

Kono you ni kagiri wa aru no?
moshimo hate ga mieta nara

dou yatte warau ka tanoshimou ka
mou yari tsukushita ne

jaa nando datte wasureyou
soshite mata atarashiku deaereba subarashii
sayounara
hajimemashite

ENGLISH:
Is there any limit to this world?
And if in fact we've seen the end
How could we ever laugh or enjoy ourselves again?
We've already exhausted everything, haven't we?

So, let's forget each other countless times
And when we meet again, it will be wonderful
Goodbye
Nice to meet you


I need some "Mucus-Be-Gone". In an elephant sized hypodermic. Applied directly to my sinuses. Woe betide me.

Gotta find a distraction.

Akemashite Omedetou Gozaimasu

Hey yo hey, dudes.

Kotoshi mo yoroshiku onegai itashimasu! or "Please put up with me this year as well!"

Happy New Year from the frozen inaka! New Year has come and gone. Stacks of rotund smooth gelatinous rice cakes topped with a single bright orange mikan are displayed in every shop window. My brats are rolling in wealth from being spoiled by relatives. Red seafood like crab, lobster and sea bream can hardly be kept on the fishmonger's block.

I long for fried cheese.

It's so cold now that when I wake up in the morning I can see my breath. Suddenly the heated toilet seats make sense. I'd forgotten to turn my seat heater on when I got home and I was unkindly reminded. Japanese homes are not heated centrally except in Hokkaido. I have three portable electric heaters, a ratty eletric blanket and many layers of warm clothes to get me through the brutal winter. As I am secluded to the one room I bother to heat, I like to burrow underneath my blankets and relax with some genmai-cha and pretty music.

Lately on the roster has been MIA DOI TODD'S "What if We Do?" because her voice is more like an aroma and this song is a tempting invite, somehow both casually and elegantly offered.

I wish I could tell you the name of the next song constantly played on my IPod of late but I can't read Korean. Here's what the CD came up with:

"봄봄 Ul 3523"

All I can tell you is the singer's name is KIM JUNG MI and the album is called NOW. I'd never heard anything from Korea except pop and hip-hop so it was refreshing to hear some psychedelic 70's folk rock from the land that gave us kimchee. The recording If you're curious at all, e-mail me and I can send you the track. It's lovely.

Directly after this track, I like to play "Aqueous Transmissions" by INCUBUS. Thank you, Incubus. I don't even know what Brandon Boyd is singing about, I'm too caught up by the Mulan charm of the shamisen, Chinese violin and flute arrangement.

Speaking of pretty, MAAYA SAKAMOTO'S string of solo albums never really interested me even though I devoured most of her faithful collaboration work with the anime powerhouse composer YOKO KANNO. Sakamoto recently released an album with some English tracks called "Shonen Alice". Two of the songs therein were on constant replay on my Ipod not long ago. "Chibikko Folk" and "Kingfisher Girl". The latter is sung in English and is either sappy or gorgeous depending on who you are. When I hear it, I think of many things fanciful. Like old faded Russian cartoons, fairy tales or stained glass. Sakamoto's voice is sweet and uncomplicated and though it is somewhat evident that English isn't her native language, the melodic arrangement makes up for it. Yes, this song probably belongs on an anime soundtrack but hey, that's always been Maya's bread and butter and my old pastime.

At any rate, it's a song I'd one day like to sing to my kids.

If I ever got confident with Spanish, I'd also learn to sing MECANO'S "Hijo de la Luna". Beautiful, haunting. The original version is fine by me but BELLE PEREZ has done a completely acoustic version which I find even more intriguing. The song is actually a bloody waltz between a scheming moon and a foolish dark gypsy. I can't listen to this song without seeing the story. It's one of those.

I first fell for MATTHEW SWEET because his video for "Girlfriend" featured an ancient anime from the 80's, back when anime was still something you had to dig for. I always considered that song my favorite but then I found "Devil with the Green Eyes".

I've always been a fan of songs written like childhood flashbacks. NIZLOPI'S "JCB Song" reminds me faintly of GLEN PHILLIPS' "Drive By" only Nizlopi is a Brit dude recording from his bedroom. This lyric makes me ache to be a lad with a dad who knew what to say to lads.

"I'm Luke, I'm five and my Dad's Bruce Lee"

RHETT MILLER'S old band the OLD 97's did a great song called "Designs on You" which I play when I miss my sister. Oh yeah, if you haven't heard A PERFECT CIRCLE'S acoustic version of "Three Libras", it's way more haunting, creepy and beautful than the album version ever managed in my opinion.


SONGS TO SEEK:

What if We Do?/Mia Doi Todd

봄봄 Ul 3523/Kim Jung Mi

Aqueous Transmissions/Incubus

Chibbiko Folk/Maaya Sakamoto Kingfisher Girl/Maaya Sakamoto

Hijo de la Luna/Belle Perez

Devil with the Green Eyes/Matthew Sweet

JCB Song/Nizlopi

Drive By/Glenn Phillips

Designs on You (acoustic)/Old 97

Three Libras (acoustic)/A Perfect Circle

Bounder and a Cad

Hey yo hey,

Long time no see, dudes.

So I was in some pub hanging out with Paul, the new Brit specimen from GEOS (local English school) when AMAGAWA (River of Heaven) started playing on the radio.

"Oh, I know this song!" Paul said. "That band was on Pop Jam the other day. Who were they? Crazy...crazy something....?"

"What did they look like?" I wanted to know.

"They had the most impressive afros."

"That would be the Crazy Ken Band."

They surface every now and again. On TV commercials. On talk shows. They're one of the mega-bands with 11 odd members and a brass outfit. They're something slightly akin to Tokyo Ska Paradise if TSP were inclined to hip-hop. Crazy Ken combines the likes of rap group m-flo with a tad of ska, maybe some salsa and a killa shamisen. Throw in the crusty, closing-the-bar croon of Crazy Ken himself and you've got yourself a hell of an operation. He's so Vegas and seedy. His voice smells like 50 years of cigarette smoke. It makes me want to recline on velvet, leer and carress diamonds.

Haven't had time to listen to much lately. Been so busy and today was one of those days I just wanted to sleep. If you don't like people then this job ain't for you. Fortunately, I like people 90% of the time. On the days that I don't, I just kind of stumble through and improvise. I teach elementary school kids now. There is no end to the love but there is a definite cap on my energy. Feel good music is in order. Today as I tried to get a group of stony-faced 10 year olds happy and clapping to the Cat Empire's "Hello Hello" (a recent standard on my self-introduction mixes), the CD player crapped out and there we were stuck playing hot potato with no tuneage. Fortunately, I am resourceful and don't mind being ridiculed.

Thus the game continued with me jumping about like my ass had caught fire and clapping to a bellowed rendition of Spitz's "Ai no Shirushi".

Speaking of Spitz, holy crap dudes, some Brit band (no idea who) translated and covered Spitz's first hit, "Robinson". Ah, this song practically begs for a Brit accent. It's like a first bite of PBJ after 20 odd years of abstinence. Go here to have a listen:

http://www.aoihayashi.com/spitz/audio.html

Speaking of Brits, I've been listening to THE CAT EMPIRE and THE KAISER CHIEFS a lot for some reason. CAT EMPIRE makes me smile.

Oh yeah, back in the day I heard a Japanese chick who sounded an awful lot like Macy Gray who had a voice I liked a lot more. The song was catchy. Even Tavie kinda liked it and I always figure if Tavie likes something, it has to be good cuz there's some kinda wacky big sister approval vibe going on in my psyche even though that's total jive.

Anyway, back to the singer. Her name is Bonnie Pink and I love taking long baths with "He" in the background.


Songs to Seek: CRAZY KEN BAND Amagawa, Life is Beautiful, Yoru no Vibrate (実演！夜のヴィブラート), SPITZ Robinson, BONNIE PINK It's Gonna Rain/He/Inu to Tsuki (Dog and the Moon 犬と月)/Evil and Flowers

I sense no pattern here

I wanna play tooooooooooo!

1. how am I feeling today? "Oxala" Madredeus
2. will I get far in life? "Mulitply" Teenage Squirrel (Getting far really is a misconception.)
3. how do my friends see me? "My Girl is a Beard" Thunderbirds (hahaha!)
4. where will I get married? "Run Around" Blues Traveler
5. what is my best friend? "Star power" Ezra Reich
6. what is the story of my life? "Goodbye is Forever" Arcadia (huh?)
7. what was high school like? "Underwater" dip (maybe maybe so)
8. how can I get ahead in life? "Sister, Do You Know My Name" White Stripes (wtf, mate?)
9. what is the best thing about me? "Man Who Sold the World" David Bowie
10. what is today going to be like? "Portland Oregon" Loretta Lynn and Jack White (White again?)
11. what's in store for this week? "Image Fight" Quruli (raWr!)
12. what is in store for this weekend? "Army" Quruli (again?!?! Shite, I have a lot of Quruli)
13. what song describes my parents? "Bolero Falaz" Aterciopelados (eh. notsomuch)
14. to describe my grandparents? "I Believe in a Thing Called Love" The Darkness (HAHA! Dude, my ancestors believed in a thing called chopped liver. Love was never the thing)
15. how is my life going? "Invitation" Dragon Ash (sottobi warande. Yeah, ok, I'll buy that)
16. what song will they play at my funeral? "How Long" Red Hot Chili Peppers (LAME!)
17. how does the world see me? "Herida" Brenda K Starr (hahaha! I am a salsa vixen)
18. will I have a happy life? "Bad Reputation" Joan Jett
19. what do my friends really think of me? "Mirame" Daddy Yankee
20. do people secretly lust after me? "Trifles" Maika Shiratori (I'll take that as an angst ridden maybe)
21. how can I make myself happy? "Chinga Tu Madre" Molotov (HAHAHAHA!)
22. what should I do with my life? "Wave of Mutilation" Number Girl
23. will I ever have children? "True Colors" Cyndi Lauper (christ)
24. what is some good advice for me? "Always" Stevie Wonder (fuck I love this song!!!)
25. how will I be remembered? "Take it Off" The Donnas (bleh)
26. what is my signature dancing song? "70% Yuugure no Uta" Chara (sure, I like to slither)
27. what is my current theme song? "Smalltime Shot Away" Massive Attack (no way no way)
28. what does everyone else think my current theme song is? "Mira la Esencia" Aterciopelados (them again?)
29. what type of women do I like? "Moonlight Sonata" Beethoven (drammy goth bizznatches?)
30. what type of men do I like? "Waterloo Sunset" Elliot Smith

Are You as Old as You are Poised?

Oh what a tasteful group!

Now that the lights are on, I can see just how tasteful you really are.

I just quoted Bette Middler.　Don't judge me? Okay fine, judge me.

Ever since I was a wee and tender zygote, I have been dazzled by ladies who draw crowds. Who don't need to bare a thing. Who know exactly what they want to see and don't give a flying chinchilla what anybody else thinks. (added bonus: if they growl, I get extra happy)

I refuse to recognize Shiina Ringo's latest obsession, the collective Tokyo Jihen, as anything cool even though they completely are. Yet the declaration "I just saw Tokyo Jihen" somehow lacks panache to me. Yes, they are staggeringly good performers, achingly brilliant musicians (her appleship would have nothing less), and just the cat's meow but fuck me if I can remember their names. (Seiji Kameda on bass however is an exception as he is a multi-tasker) I saw Shiina Ringo live. There, that feels better.

I kinda wondered what the average Shiina Ringo fan looked like. Back home, I was by and large a hermit with my obsession. Oh, I had to fight for these tickets. They sold out faster than the Pocky du Jour. I had to score from a Yahoo auction to see my idol live in Niigata. The venue was not huge which I appreciated. Ringo doesn't do Tokyo Dome. That's for the screaming Gackt fans. The crowd was mostly my age, female and fashionably dressed.

Aside from the cosplayers. I may be mad but the last thing I ever cosplayed for was the "Brain Candy" premiere and I was all of 16 then and that is the only excuse I will make for myself. Some turned up in kimono. Ringo has a tendency to doll up in customary threads. If a kimono isn't tasteful, I don't know what is. I spied a nurse costume in the mix. A Shou Shou Stripper. Whatever dudes. Go ahead and be 16.

Ringo embraces the vintage. Her flavor is blending rock and jazz/enka. She didn't do it as skillfully on Tokyo Jihen's debut, Kyoiku. It was wise, however, to keep Seiji Kameda (bass) around. I always thought that even if I didn't particularly like Shiina's delivery of a song, her arranger was a genius. That genius was Kameda. He was her producer for Shou Shou Strip and his influence is prominent on Tokyo Jihen's second album, ADULT. How do I know this? Because behind every likeable Ringo tune there is a turtle field (亀Kame=turtle, 田da=field) and I like every song on it.

The stage was dominated by a huge projection of a Heian-era courtesan. When the room darkened, it went black and tiny points of projected snow flitted across the stage. Cue swirling piano. Enter Ringo. A vision in heavy white silk and black obi, carrying an umbrella and singing "Yuki Kuni" (Snow Country) with all the drama and flair of an abandoned diva, elegantly bitchy. She began delicate and ended with a bite. I swooned. The stage direction was outstanding. The Lady knows how to put on a show.

Other notable tracks from her latest offering are the infectious and nigh on bouncy "Toumei Ningen" (Invisible Human). I hear it and think of sunny streets and rousing musical finales. A happy ending hurrah. Then there's the majestique show-stopper, "Superstar". My personal favorite was not offered that night, a B side from one of her singles called "Kurumaya-san" (Car Salesman). A fusion of bluesy jazz or jazzy blues with some flaming enka in the cocktail. I adore it. There's also Keshou Naoshi (Redecoration) for those more into the bossa nova. Not as good as Miho Hatori's take on the genre (I like Miho' voice better with that shade) but still noteworthy.

On the subject of enka, I have been hooked on this ditty ever since I saw it lip-synched by the dashing and pouty Ryuhei Matsuda. Not since Duran Duran's heyday has pink lip gloss ever looked so stunning on a boy. The film is called "Showa Kayou Daizenshuu" (Showa Love Ballad Greatest Hits). A quirky underground comedy about a gang of middle aged housewives and jobless young men (two volatile and potentially dangerous groups who operate in packs) and their shared obsession--cheesy love ballads.

The song is called "Koi no Kisetsu" (Love Season) and it's by Pinky and the Killers. If Austin Powers were Japanese, this would be playing in his swank ride.

I will end with a guilty pleasure. I only like two things about Miyavi--his hair and one song. I could compare both to jellybeans. The song has an extravegantly long name and is reminiscent of rockabilly Green Day. In short, it's called "Kekkonshiki no Uta" or "Wedding Ceremony Song".


Songs to seek:

Yuki Kuni雪国/Toumei Ningen透明人間/Superstar/Kurumaya-san車やーさん/Keshou Naoshi化粧直し - TOKYO JIHEN 東京事変

Kisetsu no Koi 季節の恋／Pinky and the Killers ピンキとキラーズ

Kekkonshiki no Uta　結婚式の歌/Miyavi

Overdrive

Hey yo hey,

Happiness reigns.

Dear Japan,

Why do you kick your own arse? You create gems and then you HIDE them. When a movie fails in Japan, you have to hunt far and wide for it. Pathetically for me, I adore most of what Japan considers to be crap. Take, for example, a movie called OVERDRIVE. There is next to no info on it. Even the IMDB is vague. I have doubts as to whether it's really even Japanese. I have a vague suspicion the director is Swedish.

Anyway...

I love Shamisen. I do I do I do. This movie is one long shamisen porn starring (oh jesus god there's another??) HAWT shamisen player, Masahiro Nitta. As expected, the Yoshida Brothers DID have a cameo. How could they not?

The story: One fateful night, hounded by media and papparazzi, a disenchanted Tokyo rock guitarist flees into a cab. The driver, a classic old man, gives him a classic unknown drink and he passes out classically. He regains consciousness to find himself in the backwoods of Aoyama with a tab of $2,000.

The old man, sent by Destiny (Destiny as portrayed by ubercute hip hop vixen, Sayuri) has shanghaied our unwitting protagonist to Shamisen Boot Camp where he will undergo rigorous training in order to return to his Japanese roots and discover the hidden star within himself. Yes, he'll win the competition, win the girl and Destiny will be silenced.

A clever comedy with a killer soundtrack. Can anything be finer? The movie is full of the East vs West turmoil. With the wave of shamisen players these days gaining rock-star status, I would have thought it would get more acclaim in its native land. Oh well. It's a fact. Traditional Japanese culture is cool everywhere BUT Japan.

Their loss.

Throughout his journey, the protagonist's thoughts are broken by interludes from Destiny who parades around in fanciful hairstyles and furisode to rap about the current dillemma. The interludes are less than a minute long and they tickled my fancy. Some mergings of traditional and modern piss me off for reasons I won't rant about here but this didn't. Why? Because the shamisen in the background is fucking kickass and Sayuri manages to rap like she's folkin it. Is she talking to the gods or us? Couldn't tell ya.

Eh, if you an find this film, rent it? Try KIM'S.

And now, samples. Cuz you probably won't find them unless you buy the soundtrack which was next to impossible to find here.

http://hometown.aol.com/Jink246/Overdrive+-+The+Modern+Guitar+Gun.mp3

(the woman screaming in the background hates guitars)

http://hometown.aol.com/Jink246/Overdrive+-Butsomething+is.mp3


http://hometown.aol.com/Jink246/Overdrive+-SENTIMENTAL+JOHNNY.mp3

Songs For your Sadness

Woe.

My Prefecture is poor. So I am out a contract. A tragic week indeed. A slump not cured by booze or cigarettes. Not even Harry Belafonte can shake my sorrow. I have been lying in bed all weekend caring nothing for my being (ie stench) and listening to my plague-stricken comrade tell me of the palette of yellow she's producing. Yuck. Yuck. YUCK!!!

I am heartbroken. I love my job and my students and now I have to leave them for something uncertain. Can I get weepy for sec?

http://hometown.aol.com/Jink246/bratz.jpg

The brat on the left is Ichiro. He handles English like he was born with it and always talks in class. I will miss the little punk and the way he always sticks his hand in his pocket when he speaks to me. He, like most 13 year olds, is obsessed with Harry Potter. So ya know I went out and found "Voldemort Can't Stop the Rock" by Harry and the Potters and burned it just for him.

You don't stand a chance against Gryffindor
We got the best Quidditch Team that the school has seen

Yeah, yeah I'm lame.
The Foo Fighters' "Everlong" matches my shade right now. That and about anything by the Peppers. "I Could Have Lied", for one.

Went to a farewell party at the karaoke joint. Gaijin vs Nihonjn (The US soccer team destroyed Japan in San Francisco, btw. YAPPA! IN YOUR FOOKIN FACE KAWAGUCHI! The ball, that is.)

Let me give three examples of songs that will forever be funny at karaoke:

1) Anything For Love - Meatloaf

Fuck, this song is funny out of karaoke. Let the drunk gaijin unite.

2) We Didn't Start the Fire- Billy Joel

Wanna see the Japanese hurt?

3) Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious- Julie Andrews

Nuff said.

I have noticed a lot of Okinawa floating around. Three of the recent top-selling Japanese pop groups have hailed from the Ryuukan kingdom. HY, Orange Range and Namie Amuro. HY has been labeled "indie". By that I suppose they haven't yet had to back POCKY or some J-drama to sell their craft. I believe it is only a matter of time. Sure they bite from US pop (like most) but they're not above adding a shansin to the chorus. Thanks guys.

As I am a fan of the old skool, Natsukawa Rimi's "Nada Sou Sou" (Stream of Tears) will still make me weep like a goddam child. Oh it's sap pure and simple. No getting around it.

Songs to Seek:

Nada Sou Sou/Natsukawa Rimi, Street Story/HY

Whole Lot of Blah Blah Blah

This week all the Niigata ALTs gathered in Niigata City to attend the mandatory "Mid-Year Seminar". Two days straight of blah blah blah. Many of us were accompanied by our JTEs (Japanese Teachers of English) so that both teachers and pseudo-teachers alike could partake in the cornucopia of useless information.

My comrade in arms and I presented a workshop on "Music in the Classroom". When I brought this up with my Stateside friend, she scoffed. "Like, OMG Kirsten, what are your classes like? I mean, is it just a round of duck-duck-goose?" Her implication was that the ALT-led Oral Conversation classes in most Japanese schools are candy fluff. This is not totally inaccurate. These kids see foreigners only on TV. Before they are old enough for ALT classes, most of them have never even met anyone outside their own ken, let alone spoken with a gaijin. You're a Japanese high school kid. You study longer hours than your parents' workday. You have club activities and community service. You want to grow up to be doctor/lawyer/farmer/office drone. English is the last thing on your mind.

Except everytime you turn on the radio.

"DON'T WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT!"

There's curiosity. There's envy, maybe. There's a whole lot of mispronunciation. We are ALTs. We are here to set the record straight because most Japanese teachers of English are tragically INEPT at the task.

Music breaks the ice. Even the most sullen, anti-English badass will perk once you start playing anything by WHAM!

Yes, WHAM!

The workshop was extremely successful. Music in the classroom will work for all curriculums in all grades. Low-level. Mid-level. High-level academic. Vocational school. Elementary school. Music will always get a response. Make them fill in the blanks while listening to Natasha Bedingfield (my kids ADORED her). If you wanna make 'em hurt, play some radio edited Green Day. Introduce them to some new music and the more ambitious ones may actually learn how to pronounce the word "lend".

We designed an activity like the "fill in the blank" except we used a Japanese pop song to stump the ALTs. The song was called SEISHUN AMIGO. (seishun=youth) by a band composed of two members of already existing boy pop bands. SHUJI & AKIRA. It was horrendous. It was poppy. It was effective. The 20-something ALTs were in rapt attention.

We did well.

We also advocated that ALTs attempt to learn at least one J-POP song, even if only to get closer to their coworkers. After the QUEEN and BEATLES rounds, your Japanese coworkers will probably not know how to sing anything you choose in English. So why not bat on their team for a second? They'll appreciate it.

By the by, there's been a trend of random Spanish in J-pop lately. I actually heard DRAGON ASH singing in Spanese on their latest album "Rio de Emocion". My Spanish skillz don't extend beyond a high school education but even I could tell the pronunciation was atrocious.*

Yet, despite the mangling, this sign is encouraging. Who says English is the end all and be all of foreign language? Some of my students don't give a damn about English but they approach me with questions about Spanish or French. The world is huuuuge, kids! Get out there and don't be afraid of looking like an asshole. Cuz you will. ^^

In other music news, TOKYO JIHEN will be playing Niigata City in April on a Friday night.

Shiina Ringo live. I can now die.

And in OTHER Kirsten-thrilling news, Cocco is back!!!! She's coming out with a new single!!! Is it my birthday or something??? I don't care if it's shitty. I don't care if Cocco just sneezes into the mic for 4 minutes. I will attack.

Also, I never liked the Japanese rap group "m-flo" until I heard the song "HEY!" It reminds me of Cibo Matto with a bit less bite and tad more hmmm....actual Japanese. Come on. Come on. Come on. Kumon. eventually morphs into a heartbeat.


*On the subject of atrocious pronunciation, has anyone ever heard New Order's Japanese version of KRAFTY? My word.


SONGS TO SEEK:

HEY/m-flo, Palmas Rock/Dragon Ash, Seishun Amigo/ Shuji to Akira

And if you really wanna hear Dragon Ash murder Spanish....Los Lobos/Dragon Ash

Point and Stare

These dudes are Japanese?

Yup.

Nahhhh.

Ayup

Download some Ellegarden. Tell me if I'm crazy?

Oh yeah, when I start my future gurl rawk band, I'm gonna name it Ewan Twat Army. We will sing only in Japanese and the country will say "Maji de, Amerkajin??"

Dir en Grey is going to SXSW. Vis kei in Texas. Jesus. FREEEEEAKS!

Want to hear something disgusting? Get Ai Ootsuka's "Sakuranbo".

My kids bounce to this like they were made outta rubba. Good for hauling selves to train stations in the middle of holyshitfuck blizzards and fantasies of carnage. Thanks, Japan. You shouldn't have.

Song to Prod: Autumn Song/Ellegarden, Under Control/Ellegarden, Sakuranbo/Ai Ootsua

Down in the Underground You'll Find Someone True

Hello m'friends!

My supervisor is a waste of space. ^_^

God help me if I ever fell off a roof. This is what he’d say:

“Oh K-chan, try not to die, okay?”

I am sure in some universe he means well. But I find things get done ACTUALLY if I don't rely on him.

So I asked him to make a reservation for a pick up at Narita. Gave him a phone number and the date. Not that I couldn’t probably do it myself but I am completely busy and one less phone hassle would make my week less painful.

He laughed at me and said "K-chan, I don't believe such a thing exists.”

Try anyway you worthless twat.

In reality, I opted to respond in his language. “Well, be that as it may I am very busy right now so if it would not be inconvenient please call this number that doesn't exist for me, okay?”

He laughed again. He finds my Japanese as amusing as I find his English. Except I never laugh.

Kids are taking exams now so I am needed not so much. I have been playing El Jezel's Hidden Track fairly nonstop since I got it. George and Jess. I miss you.

At Shinada's house last night boozing and watching Japan MTV. They were doing a tribute to Number Girl, Japan's answer to the Pixies. Number Girl is now no longer but they helped start the Japanese underground scene. They recently released an obligatory "Greatest Hits and B Sides" album (forthcoming Christmas present to myself) so all the music stations are focusing on them.
"Hey! Number Girl!" I cried. The video to Cibbicoさん　was playing. It looked like an episode of the Upright Citizens Brigade. The band members meandering high and dazed around Tokyo. Getting lost in hidden stairways and questionable establishments run by intimidating men. Collpasing in the middle of a busy intersection. Running in circles around Shibuya. Provoking stares. I was glued to the set like a kitty outside a tuna factory. Face against the glass, breathing heavy, misting up the pixels.

"Oh! You very underground!" Shinada remarked. "Even Japanese don't know them."
"Their loss, dude." Said I.
"OTAKU!”("You geek!")
"Yes." I make no arguments.
"We never listen this kind of music."
"Well, what DO you listen to?" I asked with genuine curiosity.
"Maroon 5. NSync. Mariah Carey."
Or Franz Ferdinand. Green Day. Ashley Simpson. Etc.

It's the same with movies. Japanese films are a sub-genre in their own country. Which is a real shame because a lot of them are awesome. Take Toyoda Toshiaki, a director from Osaka--a city reputed for yakuza. Not only does he have superb taste in actors but he also has a fine ear for music. Tell, not sell. I can thank his 2001 “gritty” high school drama Aoi Haru for introducing me to Thee Michelle Gun Elephant.

A few months back, I rented another of his films called 9 souls. A drama about 9 escaped convicts and their downward spirals. The film was moving, if a bit long (as reality is wont to be), but what got me was the music. No, I can't describe it in educated terms. I don't know a hook from a hack from a hock. All I know is that I watched that scene over and over again just for that song. The song shared the same title as the film (9souls) and was by a Japanese group called dip. It was a long song. About 7 minutes and ferocious. Kind of like Man in Gray's NiV at its peak. Minimal lyrics. Fine. The usual broken poetry of Japanese indies.

Hmmm. dip. I liked dip. But they were nowhere to be found.

I traveled to a bigger city and sought out the biggest electronic store in town. There I found the soundtrack to a cheesy Japanese comedy called ROKKAZU, about the start of the 80's punk scene in Japan. Based on a true story. Pompadours a-flyin. Music none too shabby.

Favorite scene: Our plucky little indie band has been booked to entertain a crowd of scary yakuza gangsters and their scarier hoes. Courageously, they begin all a-tremble with a broken English slow dance called Mary Jane. The thugs seem to tolerate it and hit the floor with their hoes who methodically smack hands away from their asses.

BUT!!!!

Before the song can come to a lackluster end, the NEW guitarist--yeah, the mysterious character in black who wears sunglasses all the time and NEVER speaks--suddenly leaps in front of the vocalist and starts belting out a punk version of the song.

Now they're rockin! *thumbs up*

It was so fucking cheesy. See this film.

So I scored the soundtrack to ROKKAZU at the MEGA HUGE MIND BOGGLING electronics store in Niigata shi. Flipping through the "Indies" section, I noticed a CD cover that looked oddly familiar.

Isn't that...PIANOS? East Village Bar. Good cocktails. Home to the Whitest Kids You Know?

Why so it was.

I turned the CD over.

Oh...my god...it's DIPPPPPPP!*

They had played in NY just last summer. A picture of the band setting up in front of the establishment. They're in Tokyo now I suppose. All roads eventually lead to Tokyo.

I went home very very happy.

I am sorry I can't post samples yet. I intend to do that when I get home. Happy Holidays, guys!


*Name that quote

Songs to seek: Cibicco san/Number Girl, Teppu Suru Doku Natte/Number Girl, Manga Sick/Number Girl, Mary Jane/ROCKERS soundtrack, 9souls/dip