Haven't slept since summer oh how I try

Dear friends,

The room is dry and dark and his eyes are shining like tiny, wet pebbles. They are about the same color. He's not feeling well. He's having a hard time breathing. When I try to help him, he bats my hands away. He doesn't want them anywhere near his face. He scowls.

I can't think.

I help him sit up. Some light is peeking through the shutters but it would be hard to tell the exact time of day. It doesn't matter. It really has been one long day. For months. The computer hums in the corner. That's when the voices start. Low and lower. We both turn towards the sound. We breathe and listen. The tiny speakers vibrate. After a while, his small fingers stretch out, resting on my sweater like a starfish. He grabs some of the black wool and pulls it to his mouth. I'm too tired to do anything but stare. He stares back. The music ends.

Concrete Walls/Fever Ray (mp3)

Karin Dreijer Andersson is trying to freak you the fuck out.
Buy Fever Ray by Fever Ray from Amazon MP3.

A friend recommended this cd to me as a great "new mommy record" and bless his heart, it is. This song in particular, slow as molasses, a lullaby sung to a child that won't ever sleep.

Love, D