If I were in Kindergarten I'd dance with my eyes closed

I like to dance.

I like to pretend I'm good at it too but it's a sham. I like to do a lot of things I'm not good at but then dignity has never been much my thing. While I will embrace the cha cha over anything coughed out digitally, in this land of blue soda-flavored jello I will shake my cula to whatever's within reach. I'm too tired to hunt these days.

I couldn't help but fall for W's cover of my latest drug 恋のバカンス/Love Vacance. The original kicks its ass but there are times when my aesthetics run parallel to that of a 50 year old virgin. In the face of this spectacle, there's really no point in trying not to smile.

If I were in Kindergarten, HALICALI would rule my brainwaves and Giri Giri Surf Rider would be my jam. Is there anything more amusing than Japanese girls rapping in tandem? Augh! It oughta be outlawed. I think I like Speena's cover of Material Girl for one reason and one only: the dry Brit dude in the intro. Everything after that is well, Madonna.

I've never seen Suneo Hair but he'd do well on the Muppet Show. He is a master of the ditty. Complete with striped jacket and straw boater. 真夜中のシャフル/Mayonaka Shuffle is just the bee's knees. A skip in the park with Kermit and his nephew Robin.

Speaking of Madonna, let's rewind for a sec. The opening riff of Kyoko Koizumi's cover of Heaven Academy/天国学園 will immediately transport you back to the Breakfast Club. I am a fucking sucker for anything that makes me taste pink neon. This is inarguably one of those hand-clapping, high-fivin', cowabunga Mickey Mouse club jives. I don't know what it'll do for you but it gets my dishes done a lot faster.

Gee, BOOWY. Where'd you pick up your game? The band itself makes no illusions as to its idol. Of course Hotei was involved. I've compared the likes of Tomoyasu Hotei to the Thin White Duke before. If Bowie spoke Japanese and had a legendary band in the 80's, all he'd have to do is misspell his name slightly. Their song Cloudy Heart makes me think I'm watching the credits roll by on an 80's film. The similarities will be striking but I was pleased. After all, if it speaks Japanese and croons in a way that has long made my insides tingle, how can I say no?

For those curious.


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